


A Captain's Thoughts

by Athena13



Series: Thoughts [3]
Category: Battlestar Galactica (1978)
Genre: Athenafic, F/M, Introspection, Love, thoughts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-09-29
Updated: 2013-09-29
Packaged: 2017-12-27 22:23:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,437
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/984300
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Athena13/pseuds/Athena13
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>What does the Blue Squadron Captain think about what's going on?</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Captain's Thoughts

I know he’s my best friend and I should have known what was going on, but he refused to tell me! He’s been antsy for a few sectons now. Starbuck is almost never like this. Well, not until the past few sectars. He’s been closer to the edge than I’ve ever seen him, emotionally, that is, not professionally. Professionally, he’s always on the edge. It’s what makes him a great warrior. But lately, his emotions have been so raw and close to the edge, as well.

For a while, I was pleased to see it. It seemed like he was finally maturing emotionally and preparing for the inevitable commitment to Cassiopeia. I knew it was hard for him to give up his carefree ways with women and take the plunge, perhaps better than anyone. Not just as his friend, but as someone sitting close to that edge myself. 

But this ramble isn’t about me, this is about Starbuck. And it seems I was way off base in my deductions.

These days, Starbuck can’t look me in the eyes. Whatever is on his mind is obviously something he’s afraid to tell me. And there has only been one thing Starbuck has been afraid to tell me, ever. Which brings me back to my suspicions. It’s taken me until now to figure things out, but I think I got it right now.

Actually, it wasn’t my amazing powers of deduction that led me to this conclusion. When it comes to matters of the heart I can be pretty dense. If Serina hadn’t been so confident and bold, who knows how long it might have taken us to get together? Probably as long as it’s going to take with Sheba. I didn’t figure that out either, she had to tell me, too. And I still haven’t done anything about it. No, figuring out what was wrong with Starbuck, and yes I tried asking him, practically took a diagram.

They were all standing in front of me earlier tonight before I got it. 

I was innocently on my way to my Father’s quarters for a family dinner when I ran into Starbuck and Cassi on their way there as well. They weren’t talking to each other, but I knew right away that it wasn’t a companionable silence. It didn’t seem like they had had a fight either. There was just this tension that made me want to rush past and tell them I’d see them there. Of course I couldn’t do that. 

Then it hit me that this tension wasn’t something new. It had been slowly building since Starbuck and I returned from the baseship. I guess I just discounted it as post-mission stress at the time.

Now, there was no avoiding seeing it. And Cassi noticed I noticed. And Starbuck couldn’t look me in the eyes, as I said already. Neither did he look Cassi in the eyes. 

I still really had no idea what was going on. If Starbuck and Cassi were having problems why couldn’t my friend look _me_ in the eyes? It didn’t make any sense. Then we ran into Athena, also on her way to dinner. That’s when it all started to fall into place like the diagram I obviously needed.

I was playing diplomat and having a conversation with Cassi while Starbuck trudged along _quietly_ behind me (as if that wasn’t odd enough) when we ran into her. Although a more accurate description would be that she ran into us. Athena had been running down the corridors, as we’d been admonished our whole lives never to do, and almost plowed into Starbuck. In her defense, she was being chased by Captain Biehn and had been too busy looking behind her to see where she was going. My sister has always been rambunctious. Like my wingmate. Usually. 

Cassi and I both turned at the commotion and found Starbuck holding Athena by her midriff to keep her from falling over and Captain Biehn doubled over laughing next to them. Athena was laughing herself and trying to untangle herself from Starbuck’s arms. The problem was, Starbuck wouldn’t let go. He wasn’t holding her hostage or anything; but he was a little too slow about the whole thing. And we all noticed - especially Cassi who turned and walked away before anyone had a chance to say a word. Starbuck didn’t even notice as his eyes were glued on my sister.

I was happy to see that Athena didn’t appear to be enjoying the attention and pushed him away to get his arms off of her. She was still laughing as she did it and didn’t seem to notice what was going on with everyone else as she turned towards Biehn. She stopped laughing, however, when Starbuck grabbed her by the arm. 

I’ve never seen anyone still as quickly as my sister did at that moment. She turned and even from her profile I could see profound shock slap her in the face. It seemed she hadn’t even paid attention to who she had run into and apologized to. Then I saw fear and she backed away from him. But Starbuck didn’t let go. 

Meanwhile, I noticed Biehn looking on with interest. I knew that the last thing any of us needed was a reprise of the Starbuck-Athena rumors that had only recently died down. It was that thought that made everything click for me.

I quickly moved to divert Biehn’s attention and left Athena to take care of herself. I knew she could do it. I also knew she would kill me if I interfered and made a bigger scene. It seemed like forever, but really it was all only a few microns. As I reached Biehn’s side Starbuck came to his senses and let Athena go. 

Athena put her hand on Biehn’s chest and told him she’d see him tomorrow and that she would walk with me to our Father’s. I noticed that she didn’t say Starbuck’s name.

When I turned to take my friend aside and ask him what the frak was going on I noticed he was gone. So Athena and I quietly made our way to dinner. Obviously, neither of us felt like talking about Starbuck’s behavior. Athena seemed rather shaken by the experience, and I wasn’t feeling all that steady myself. It had just occurred to me, after all, that my best friend was in love with my sister. Again? Still? I wasn’t too sure of which, but he had obviously recently figured it out for himself.

So I’m not that dense. He was realizing that dating tons of women wasn’t necessary in order to find happiness. He was preparing to change and settle down with one woman. I just was wrong about which woman he had chosen. I just had no idea at the time how my sister felt. Her expression gave nothing away.

At dinner, Cassi never showed up and Starbuck showed up late. With what looked suspiciously like a fading handprint on his face. He wouldn’t look me, or anyone, in the eyes for the entire dinner. And he barely said a word. I take that back, there was one person he looked in the eyes. You guessed it, Athena. And that’s when I figured out how she felt, because she couldn’t look away from him. I could see the fear and confusion she felt, but she still couldn’t look away from him. 

That’s my baby sister, she never runs from a confrontation.

It seemed to me that Athena had thought the same thing I did, that Starbuck was going to propose to Cassi. If the handprint is any indication that’s not going to happen. Added to the silent and brooding version of my wingmate that sat through dinner staring at my sister, a definite no.

Now dinner is over and my Father is sitting in a chair drinking Ambrosa with our other family members, Boomer and Sheba, while Athena stares out the starport and I stand here waiting for Starbuck to summon the courage to come talk to me as I know he will. 

Sure enough, he’s on his way over and he’s finally looking me in the eye. I can’t help but smile at him. He really thought I was going to kill him when I found out about Athena. I wanted to last time, but not this time. This time I can tell he’s serious. And if he can convince Athena of that, and he’ll need all the luck he claims to have, then he has my support. And that’s just what I’m about to tell him.

END


End file.
